Thursday, June 21, 2007

Badoop Badoop Badoop

That's the sound that tivo makes when I fastforward through the commercials. Oh how I miss that sound. I've been 40 days without tivo now. I long for that little badoop.

I'm not sure how I made it so long. The loss was first felt when I missed all of the season finales of my favorite shows and had to watch them on my laptop. And, though my laptop has a large simply wasn't the same (and I still haven't seen the season finale of the don't anyone spoil it for me). Then, I was ok without tivo for a while, what with my new and exciting life in Portland. But then...SYTYCD started up it's third season. It's really the only show I'm watching this summer and even just one show is torture without tivo.

Here are the reasons why I hate tv without tivo:

1. I have to be home on the day and at the time that the show is on in order to watch it. WHAT?? I can't watch the show whenever it's convenient for me? This is especially an issue for SYTYCD because it's on two nights a week (and both episodes are crucial). I hate the idea of not doing something outside of the house or hurrying home in order to "catch my show."

2. I have to wait for a commercial to do things like go to the bathroom, make food, answer the phone, blow my nose, and talk to my roommates.

3. I can't rewind if I miss something. This leads to the next problem...

4. I am annoying (and annoyed) when watching tv because I don't want people to talk for fear of missing something...this makes tv watching far less social than I'm used to it being. Usually I'm pretty chill about the talking because you can always pause until the conversation is over, rewind to catch what you've missed, or just watch the whole thing later when things are less crazy.

5. I can't rewatch particularly great things (like Pasha and Jesse's contemporary Jazz dance or Jim's face when Dwight says something ridiculous) or paulse to laugh really hard at something that just happened (like GOB's falls on mother's tequilla) so we don't miss the scene that follows.

6. I can't fastforward through commercials or other really annoying things on tv like whatever dumb guest performer is on while the SYTYCD judges deliberate.

7. Watching tv takes a LOT more time than it used to...I have to multi-task in order not to feel lazy. I used to be able to blow through a tv show really quickly before heading to it takes up the whole night.

8. If I do happen to be home and bored and I want to watch tv, I can't sit down and watch something that I actually want to watch. I have to flip through the 13 channels we get (half of which are home shopping networks) in hopes that something good will be on (i.e. Seinfeld re-run or Jeopardy).

9. I can't tivo shows that look interesting but will likely be horrible (i.e. that new missing lyric show). I am not going to spend an evening at home, waiting to watch the show and then sitting through all the crap and commercials to see whether or not it's a good show. But, if I had tivo, I could record it, watch it, and decide if it was worth tivoing each week just for fun filler.

10. I miss the cute sounds it makes.

I know I'm being a snobby little brat right now. You might ask, "Why do you even still watch tv if you're so annoyed?" The answer...I still like tv. I'm an American...what can I say? I like my friends Cat, Mia and Nigel, and Izzy, and George, and Meredith, and Jim, and Pam, and Jack, and Hurley and Charlie (rest his soul) and even Sawyer and Kate and Michael. You might also ask, "Why don't you just buck up and by one for yourself you freeloader?" The answer...don't worry smarty pants, I will! I am moving to a new pad in August at which time I'll run to the nearest store and purchase the beloved machine.

The lack of tivo certainly has cut down on my tv watching...which is perhaps the greatest benefit. Despite how annoyed I get during commercial breaks when I reach for the remote and find it's missing those crucial buttons, I am just not willing to give up SYTYCD (and LOST, Grey's Anatomy, and the Office when the time comes). I even miss catching an episode of Heavy Petting in the City when nothing else is on. And, what in the world am I going to do when Project Runway starts up again? That not only requires tivo but also cable!!

I feel like my car has broken down and I've got to scrounge for change, hike up the freeway and find a payphone rather than whip out my cell phone and make a quick call. did we ever live like that? It's not that I won't make the hike...I mean, I'm stranded on the freeway for heaven's sake! But I'm sure I'd outline the top ten reasons for wishing I had a cell phone while peeling that quarter off the bottom of the car's sticky cup holder.

P.S. Here's a picture of me and Mat...he came to Portland last weekend and I never had a chance to blog about our visit. Love this kid...


ginny said...

I feel your pain. Even when I was unemployed, I sprang for tivo (well, the cable company's tifaux, Moxie), and it now defines my reality. When I go to the movie theater I get so irritated that I can't pause and rewind the movie. Sometimes I even get irritated that I can't do an instant replay on, like, a real-life guy I saw trip and fall, etc.

Emily said...

AMEN sista!! You know I am addicted to Tivo. Best thing that ever happened to me. One good thing about not having it though, you can sing along to jingles for local commercials like "call 1-800-steamer. Stanley steamer gets carpets cleaner!" I love that one. And Ginny, I am right there with you. When I miss something on the radio I always reach out desperately looking for the instant replay button, then realize there is no such thing and am very mad.

john.white said...

+1 on Tivo'ing reality, but I have seen the trailers to the movie Click which make me think about the possible side-effects to something like that. Actually, I have Click recorded on my Tivo right now!

I'm annoyed that your blog didn't start long enough ago for me to be in it. I just checked and you definitely appear in mine as "perky roommate."

Renee said...

that really is too bad...I'll have to figure out a way to work you in. You could always come up for a visit!

I agree on the Click concern. Though, somehow I feel like the idea of skipping through crap tv won't make life any worse.

Anonymous said...

I think you need to just sack up and buy a Tivo. You have master's degree, buy a Tivo or even a DVR and drink one less latte.

Conner loves ya!!

Ryan said...

I've never had Tivo, but did enjoy watching yours. I know its not the same, but Netflix is quite enjoyable.
They have a lot of Documentaries and streaming video. All for under 20 bucks a month.

gamine said...

oh how cute is my matty pat pat.

gamine said...

I'm obsessed with the DVR. I too can't watch TV without it (Suz refers to it as "watching TV like ANIMALS!"). My friend Danalee told me she was in a movie theater once and wanted to hear a scene again so she literally put her hand up and "pushed" her imaginary remote, like she was rewinding. Now THAT is DVR obsession!

Anna said...

what happened to the blog updates? ;)